Strangetown: Chapter Fifteen

[strangetomato]

 

Warnings: language, violence (including a small amount of blood)


Chapter Fifteen



"Tank? Are you still there?" Buck asked after a long silence. "Tank?"








"Yeah, I'm here."




"Are you okay?"




"Of course, I'm okay. Why wouldn't I be okay?" He didn't snap at Buck, exactly, but his tone suggested that the conversation was over. Tank obviously didn't feel the need to talk about this in much detail, so Buck wasn't about to press on.




"Listen... I don't want you to say anything to Ripp, okay? I will call him myself." Tank didn't respond.

"Tank? Are you listening to me?!"




"Yeah..." It wasn't very convincing.




"Do not talk to Ripp about this! Promise me you won't say anything to him... Tank?!"




"Yeah, yeah... I won't talk to Ripp. Like I ever talk to him anyway..."

"Just let me tell him, okay?"




"Yeah, sure..." Tank said, absently. "Look, I really have to go to class now."

"Okay," Buck sighed, "just... take care of yourself, okay?"




Buck was answered by the dial tone.

It had gone about as well as he could have hoped, but he was still very worried. With that out of the way, he readied himself for his conversation with Ripp. He slowly dialed the number.




"Hello?" It was Ophelia.




"Oh, hi, Ophelia. This is Buck. I know it's pretty early, but is Ripp awake yet?"

"Actually..." She began, "Ripp just left for class." Buck said nothing.




"I know. I was a little shocked too." She said. Ripp had been late for class, and had left about twenty minutes after Johnny, but as Johnny had been quick to remind him, he'd be in serious academic trouble if he missed this one.




"When will he be home?"

"In two or three hours, I guess. Do you want me to tell him to call you?"

"Yes, please. Tell him to call me right away."




"Is something wrong?" Ophelia was concerned.

"Just make sure that he calls me right away, please."

"Okay. I will. I'll tell him as soon as I see him."




Tank ran into Ripp on his way to class, the morning having passed him by in a haze.




Ripp saw him, raised his hand in a sloppy mock salute, and kept walking.




Tank wondered if he knew already. Surely not, if he was so cheerful. Or maybe... Tank shook at the thought of the alternative.

Tank had to know.




"Ripp! Wait!"




"God, Tank. I'm late for class here."




"Did you speak with Buck?"

"No... why?"




"Oh, okay... nevermind." He was relieved. Not even Ripp could be that heartless.




"What does Buck want? Why would he call you and not me?"

"It's nothing. Just go to class."




"No!" Ripp spat. "I want to know what he fucking told you!"

"Just forget it."

"Just fucking tell me what he said!"




Tank felt his anger rising, and suddenly he couldn't take it anymore. If Ripp wanted to know so badly, he could be Tank's guest.




"Dad fucking disappeared, okay?!" Tank yelled. "He's been gone for over a week!"




"What?" Ripp stopped in his tracks. Tank was so angry. He looked at Ripp's stupid face, and suddenly all he could think about was Ripp's outburst at dinner, and how he had cursed out their father.




"Well?! Why don't you say something, Ripp?!" Tank shouted. "You certainly had plenty to say the other evening, didn't you? You must be happy! Isn't this what you've always wanted?!"




But Ripp didn't feel the least bit happy. He felt sick to his stomach. He felt like he needed a drink. Hell, he'd need much more than one.

Instead of saying so, he said the cruelest possible thing that he could think of.




"Well, whatever happened to him, I'll bet he fucking deserved it."




And Tank was on him, beating him senseless, not that he could really feel it. He didn't fight back.




He knew that Tank would never touch him for any other reason, and it felt oddly comforting to be close to his brother.




He waited until it hurt enough for him to feel it, and his nose was bleeding, and he could taste blood, but he still didn't fight back. Maybe Tank would actually kill him.




Tank finally exhausted his rage and threw Ripp to the ground, kicking him hard a couple of times for good measure.






"You deserved this." He said, with disgust. "If anyone deserved anything, it was you."




Ripp didn't disagree with him. He figured that he really did deserve it.




"Ripp, are you in there?" Johnny was at the bathroom door, and Ripp was in the bathtub.




"I'll be out in a minute, Johnny - just chill out. Not right now, okay?"

"Are you okay? There's some blood out here..."

"Oh, I've definitely been better... Tank kind of beat the living shit out of me."




"What?! I'm coming in there - I don't care what you say." The door was locked, so he used the nail on the top of the door. He threw it open.




"Dear god! What the fuck?! Are you sure that you're okay?"




"I'm fine... I'll live."

"You're bruised all over."

"I'm pretty sure my nose is broken too."




"Holy shit! What happened? Why'd he do this?"




"The General is missing... it doesn't look good. Tank was getting in my face, and I said the wrong thing. I said something really terrible to him. It was my fault."




"What?! This is not your fault!" Johnny yelled.




"I'm going to KILL Tank! I swear to god I will kill him!"




Judging by the look on his face, Johnny probably would have been capable of murdering Tank at that moment.




"Drop it, Johnny." Ripp said, through his teeth. "It's none of your fucking business! Buzz went missing - didn't you fucking hear me?!" They glared at each other. Johnny couldn't understand why Ripp was being so unnaturally defensive of Tank's behaviour.




"God, Ripp... I'm really sorry."




"Not as sorry as I am." They continued to regard each other in silence for a couple of moments.




"Look... can I help you with that, or is this also none of my business?" Ripp shot Johnny a withering glance, but then lifted his brows with a slight shrug to indicate that Johnny could do whatever he pleased.




Johnny picked up the sponge and dabbed at Ripp's wounds. His face was twisted in such a way that Ripp could tell that he had really burned Johnny with the "mind your own business" remark. He wasn't surprised. Johnny considered everything his business.




Ripp could also tell that Johnny wasn't half as angry as he let on, because his face and his actions didn't match up at all. His hand were gentle. His graceful green fingers were very careful as they wiped the blood from his face. What anger lingered between them wouldn't last. It was already being forgotten. Ripp leaned forward and closed his eyes, as Johnny ran the sponge up and down his back.

For a moment, he felt safe, and almost happy.




Later that evening, there was a knock on Tank's door. When he answered it, Buck was standing on the porch.

"Oh shit - I mean, hi Buck. Come in -"




"I'm not impressed, Tank! Not at all."

"No, of course you're not..."




"He's your brother, Tank! Your own brother! How could you do that to him and just walk away?!"

"You weren't there! If you had just heard what he said to me, you would understand! He's such a fucking asshole!"




"I know what he's like, just as well as you do. You should have enough sense to ignore him when he gets like that!"

"I couldn't ignore it. I didn't even think about it. I just reacted."




"Well, I hear that you messed him up pretty badly. You broke his nose - at least, that's what Johnny said." Tank's eyes blinked at the mention of Johnny's name, and he seemed really worried for a second. "I haven't gone over there yet, but it sounds like you more or less tried to break his face." Buck frowned.




"Heaven forbid I destroy his pretty face!"




"Just keep talking." Buck glared at him. "You're just digging yourself in deeper, aren't you?"




"Okay!" Tank yelled. "So I shouldn't have done it! I know that, Buck! It's too late to take it back now, isn't it?!"

"Why don't you go over there with me and see him?"






"Oh, like he'd want to see me now."

"How do you know that he doesn't want you there? It's not like you asked him."




"No. God, you just don't understand, do you? I can't go to see Ripp. What would I say? He knows why I did it. We'll just forget about it, like everything else."




"Don't you think that this is a bit more serious? With Dad gone, we need to stick together..."




"I just can't go, okay?! It's not going to happen! I just can't look at him right now!"

"Well, do what you want, but you know that I'm right."




After Buck left, Frances entered the room, hesitantly.

"Tank?" he began.

Tank didn't answer him.




"What did you do?"




"Well, that was really stupid of you, don't you think?"

"What can I say? I'm not a fucking genius..."

"What were you thinking?!"




"Well, obviously, I didn't really think about the consequences before I did it."

"Obviously."

"I'm sure it was good for Tank to have something to take out his anger on."




"You aren't about to convince me that you did that for Tank's benefit, because I know that it's bullshit."




"I don't know why I did it, Buck. I truly don't. I just know that I wanted to hurt Tank, really, really fucking badly, and I think I wanted him to hurt me too."




"What?!"

"I just needed to feel actual pain... to feel something."




"Now you're just scaring me."




"Don't you feel numb too?"

"Do you feel guilty about Dad?"




"Buck, the last thing I ever said to him was a string of profanities - you were there, don't you fucking remember?"

"Yes," he agreed. "It would be difficult not to."




"I don't know how to feel. Maybe it is guilt, like you said, or regret. He was just asking me to call him Dad. I should have just fucking done it! Would it have been so hard? And now I can't take back what I said. I can never apologize now."




"Well, we don't know that for sure, do we?" Ripp remained silent and gave him a doubtful, pitying look. Ripp got up from the bed, and Buck hugged him.




"You can cry, you know."

"If I could cry, don't you think I'd be fucking doing it by now?" He was right, and Buck knew it.

"I'm sorry."




"You have nothing to apologize for. Thanks for coming."

"Just take care of yourself, okay?"

"Okay, I'll try." After a pause, he added, "I love you."

"I love you too."




Tank stood alone in the bathroom, staring into the mirror. Frances knew he was in there, but he was afraid to approach him.




Tank had been carefully appling paint to his face, under each eye, just as Buzz had worn it, and staring at his reflection.

This was, no doubt, the only way he'd ever get to look into his father's face ever again.




Tank washed his face clean again. He watched the water slowly run down the drain.








Then he went back to throwing his guts up.




Frances stood outside the door.




"Are you okay in there?"




"Of course I'm okay, Worthington! Why wouldn't I be okay?!"




"Are you sure?"

"Yes! Just leave me the fuck alone, okay?"














When Buck returned home, Jill was waiting by the door. She didn't say anything.




"I'm sorry. I should have called you."




"What's wrong?"




"I'll tell you in a minute..." Buck hugged her. "Just come inside. Please..."

"Okay."




They went inside, and Buck told Jill all about it. He finally let himself cry. Jill stood there with him for as long as it took.








"Go and pack a bag." She directed him. "You're coming to my house for the night. We can sort the rest of this shit out tomorrow..." Buck did as he was told.

Later that night, Ripp woke up to find Ophelia sitting in the chair at the edge of his bed, watching him.




"Phi, you don't have to stay in here, you know..."

"I know, but I just want to make sure that you're okay."

"What, am I on suicide watch, or something?"

"Well... sort of."

"Oh, please..." Ripp rolled his eyes, but Ophelia remained serious.




"I know what it's like to lose a parent. You might not realize it, but you're in a very delicate state right now."

"I will be fine."

"Well, I'll just feel better if I keep an eye on you, okay? At least for a while..." Ophelia's face seemed to be holding back an infinite sadness, that threatened to break free at any second. "Look, I've been there too, okay? You don't have to laugh it off and hide the truth of it from me."




"This isn't exactly the same as what happened to you, Phi."

"No, you're right. It isn't." She frowned. "I was still a child when that happened. I was left all alone." She stared ahead, holding herself together. Ripp wanted to say something comforting and appropriate, but when he opened his mouth, nothing came out.

"It's still very much the same, Ripp, and you have to deal with with the uncertainty of it too. You can't even properly mourn them... if they are dead."

"This isn't as bad as what happened to you."




"No, maybe not, but I still want to be sure that you're okay."

"Well, thank you. I do appreciate it."

Ophelia was silent for a moment, lost deep in thought. "I still can't believe that Tank could do something like this... I didn't think that he was really like that." Ripp huffed out a tiny mocking laugh.

"Does it make you regret kissing him?"




Ophelia froze. "You knew about that?"

"Yeah... I saw you." Ripp sulked. He wasn't angry like Johnny would have been, but he seemed about as hurt.

"Listen, I won't tell Johnny, if you're worried about that. I'm sure that you must have very good reasons for doing what you're doing..."

"Ripp, I'm not seeing Tank. That was just something that happened, that one time. Tank kissed me, but I told him that I wasn't interested."

"You weren't?"

"No. Of course not. We were just chatting and hanging out. I just thought that I'd give him a chance, and I thought that he was a nice enough guy, but I'm obviously not so sure about that anymore." Ripp didn't say anything, but he seemed to be thinking about something very intently.




After some time, Ripp sat up. "Phi, can I have a hug?"

"Of course."




She pulled him into a tight embrace. Ripp held her tightly, his cheek pressed fiercely to hers, and even after a few moments had passed, he did not let go.

"I want you to know that I will always be there for you, Phi, no matter what happens. You always have someone to turn to, okay?"

"Okay..." She choked back tears. He ran his fingers across the ridges of her braids.

"I don't want you to ever feel like you're alone like that again." He felt her shudder and tears began to stream down her cheek and onto his neck.






"Now, please... tell me all about it. I want to know everything."

So she did. She told him everything. Things that she'd never spoken aloud to anyone before. Nobody had ever asked her before, but Ripp wanted to know. Ripp wanted to know everything.




Ophelia started from the beginning. She told Ripp about the day that her parents drowned. How she had found them, how she had tried to do something to help them, and how it had been far too late.




She told him about how she thought about sinking to the bottom of the pool herself, and then later, stricken with grief, she had tried to. How she felt like she would lose her mind completely from grief, and how, slowly, she felt like life was worth living again.

"I still feel that way sometimes, but I'm getting stronger. I still cry about it. it's getting better, but it will never really go away."




"If you ever feel that way again, I want to hear about it."




"Okay."

"I'm serious. Any time, any place. I want you to come see me. Maybe I'm just being selfish, but I want to keep you around."




"I'll remember that."

"The world needs you to be in it. I need you, Phi. We might not have much, but we do have each other, don't we?"

"Yes. We do."




"Thank you," she said. "And, you know... I need you to be there too."

"Well, I'm not going anywhere, alright? You will be lucky to ever get rid of me." Ophelia smiled.




"Do you feel like eating? Johnny's making something for you."




"Oh, he is, is he?" Ripp smiled a very genuine smile. The sort of smile that caused fine lines and wrinkles.

"Do you feel like going downstairs, or should I go and get a tray for you?"

"I can make it downstairs, Phi. My legs aren't fucking broken, you know. Let's go eat."






Downstairs, Johnny was making omelettes, with bacon, and one for himself, made from tofu.




He set the plate down in front of Ripp and smiled. "So, is this to your liking, sir?"

"Yes, of course. Everything is exactly to my liking." Ripp squeezed Johnny's arm.




"Thank you... have I told you lately that you're fucking awesome? You might even be my favourite green friend..."




"Just eat up." Johnny laughed. "I want to see you pigging out. We don't want you wasting away on us."

"No worries, John."

"Good."




They all proceeded to dig in. Ripp, flanked by his two very favourite people, was more than happy to commit that dinner to memory.







  (Continue to Chapter 16...)

Comments

[madame-ugly.livejournal.com]

I've been thinking a lot about your Phi/Johnny/Ripp thing and. . .hmmm, should I, yeah I will. . .I think I see where you'll have an "unconventional" marriage. But then again. . .I can see a Johnny/Jayne/Ripp thing too (though not as much). Yeah, lot of potential with both. And wouldn't that unconventionality really throw a hitch in PT's view of "family". But I'm sure if there were spawn (and they were loved and well tended) he'd accept it (or he might not live long enough to see any of it *frown*).

And maybe it's just because I'm in a wedding kind of mood, but I'm really looking forward to a Buck wedding (really doesn't matter who he marries). I bet the whole "Grunts don't make public displays" thing would go out the window. Buck's never been very "gruntish" in that regard and I can see Ripp getting a wee bit verklempt, too.

Ok, let me clarify my Tank/Frances views. I want to see them rutting like rams (in my dirty mind, not in story). But that doesn't mean I see (in the story way) them as a couple. I see Tank as hetero. That's why pairing him with Frances is so titilating. It's out of character (at least the way I read Tank). I can see them as very good friends (meaning Tank confides in Frances and vice versa) but not a couple.

Now, I NEED to see the Smith house. NEED. Not only does it contain the super schweet PT *hearts* but a GIRL toddler who looks like him? Yeah, gotta see it.

[strange-tomato.livejournal.com]

I like all your theories, but I obviously can't comment on them too much at this point. I'm not surprised that you imagine a ménage à trois developing between Johnny/Ripp/Phi, but that's only one possible road that it could go down. It could end up just being a love triangle, or continue on the course it's set on right now, and they'll remain friends who become emotionally intimate, but not physically so. And maybe something will come between them. To be perfectly honest, the ultimate outcome of their relationship is one of the things that has changed significantly from my original intentions, and may change again before it's all over.

Buck will definitely get married at some point. I've always planned it. It should be a pretty grand affair too. Unless he manages to do something to fuck it up really badly, I'm sure that Ripp will be his best man. Heaven help him if he tries to make a speech without crying the whole way through. (I have a guy in my family - a couple of them, actually - that are exactly like that.)

Nothing like a "hetero" gay pairing to up the titillation level, eh? I really don't want to do something just because it's hot, so I do examine those things very carefully. My jury is still out on Tank, but like you, I do think he seems pretty hetero. Meanwhile, it's very possible to be a gay man and not fit that whole "flaming" stereotype, so it wouldn't be completely unrealistic for me if he was. Tank does have that thing where he "wonders if anyone really knows who he is" (from his Maxis bio), which could be interpreted that way. I still haven't decided.

I'm excited to get into the Smith household again too, since it feels sorely neglected. And to finally get to more of Jill and Buck interacting too. Jenny's going to have everyone over for dinner soon, so that should be a good one.

[madame-ugly.livejournal.com]

Re: Tank I see Tank as a closet case. He'd have a beard (and like it and all that) but keep a little piece of man on the side. Almost like someone having two families--ooh, I like that idea. Two families, one with a woman and one with a man (I did something like that in Nocheat once--the guys did end up together but not until the one had burned through two relationships with women and the other was widowed--oh, what great drama THAT was).

[strange-tomato.livejournal.com]

I agree. I'd see him as being so repressed about it (Oh, hi there, Buzz!), that he hasn't even been able to admit it to himself, and that angle could work. I've seen people who have a really strong anti-gay worldview who end up like that (okay, so I just mean religious belief, but I don't intend to drag that into my sim world).

But as I said, I haven't decided about Tank yet. I have a couple of potential paths mapped out for him, and I'm sure that I'm close to deciding. I'll have to pretty soon...

That does sound like a good drama! I like the "secret life" angle. I have to get back at my task of catching up on Nocheat eventually. I did get a little of it covered, but I didn't get to the really juicy stuff yet, obviously.

[madame-ugly.livejournal.com]

You'll want to check the DeTreville tag and the Khillian tag.

The drama involves my boys Onus and Jupiter. It's total soap opera fodder.

[strange-tomato.livejournal.com]

Thanks! I will check it out at some point. It sounds like good stuff. I've noticed Onus and Jupiter here and there. Onus has the cute needle nose, if I recall correctly.

[madame-ugly.livejournal.com]

Yup, that's him. I cloned them off for pixel and laridian, so you've probably seen them (they've showed up on pixel's space station and in one of laridian's legacies and her COH sims).

[strange-tomato.livejournal.com]

I remember them from a Brokeback Mountain inspired photo shoot you did too, I believe. *grin*