strangetomato | Strangetown: Chapter Twenty-Five

"Oh my god! I can't move my legs. They're like jelly. Oh my god, Ripp. I can't move. What am I going to do?"

"I'll carry you home."

"You can't do that. I'm too heavy."

"Oh yeah? Just watch me."

So he did. He picked her up and headed for their apartment, sticking to the sidewalk in an attempt to avoid slipping, even though he could save himself some distance by crossing over the sand. He didn't want to drop her, and it was talking his full concentration, and every ounce of his strength, to carry her at all.

Ophelia felt like she was flying through the air. She was being carried like a little child who was too tired to walk by herself. In fact, the last person to ever carry her like that had been her father. For a minute she let herself drift into the past, where she was young, and carefree, and completely safe. Then she looked down, and the ground seemed so far away, and Ripp seemed to be quite shaky on his feet.

"Don't drop me, Ripp. You're going to drop me."

"No, I won't, Phi. I promise. I'm not going to drop you."

"Don't do it if it's too hard. I'm too heavy."

"I can do it, okay?" He struggled to keep her held up. "Nobody ever has any faith in me."

"I do have faith in you, Ripp, but it's too hard. You're going to hurt yourself. I can hear you panting... and grunting."

"Grunting, huh? That's what us Grunts do best." They both started to giggle.

"Fuck."

The laughter had thrown him off, and they both tumbled to the ground. He managed to flip himself around so he would take the brunt of the fall, so she landed gently onto her back beside him, in an impossibly graceful motion.

"Wheeeee." She laughed as they went down. "I told you..."

"Sorry, Phi." He clumsily scrambled back to his feet, to inspect for damage. He picked a couple of tiny rocks from his elbows, but that seemed to be the worst of it. "That wasn't my fault, though. You made me laugh."

Ophelia said nothing. She just lay there, with the world spinning around her. Ripp looked down at her, so serene and beautiful, and he smiled. He thought about how nice it would be to just lower himself on top of her and let nature take its course. Just pure, raw instinct, there in the sand. How dirty and frantic and delicious it would be. How tender.

He didn't hesitate to pick her up again.

Once they were safely home, Ripp helped Ophelia to climb into her bed. The bubble blowing had really knocked her out. It was always like that the first time you did it.

She smiled. "Thanks for helping me." She had completely forgotten about the whole thing with the groceries. In fact, they had both completely forgotten about getting the groceries at all.

He was going to say something, but she had already fallen asleep. He turned off the lights and began to leave the room, then went back and observed her, as she slept peacefully. Her face had relaxed into a calm smile. Her lips were like two soft pillows. She looked so beautiful that Ripp felt like he might weep. It was almost unfair that she was so perfect.

He leaned in towards her face. He could do it, so easily. He could just touch her lips, to see how it felt. Nobody was watching him. Nobody would ever have to know. He moved his face closer, and hovered over her lips, until he could feel her breath.

Then he kissed her cheek instead.

One day, maybe, he would kiss her, but she should know about it. He wanted her to be fully aware of how he felt, and to have her kiss him back. He wanted to look into her eyes.

Would he ever be able to do that? It was her decision to make. He hoped that somehow, despite Johnny and everything else, she would find her way to him. He'd be waiting.

"Sweet dreams, Phi."

Then he went downstairs and ate a whole bag of chips. It was the last piece of food in the apartment, and he ate it as if someone was threatening to take it from him at any second.

"That's the last of the light. So, Johnny. Are we going to do this or not?"

"Yeah, sure."

"You know which one is our planet right?"

Johnny felt a little chill go up his spine when she said it. Our planet. He thought that his planet was the one he was standing on, not some tiny dot out there in space. "Yeah, of course I do. Let's see if we can find it."

"You're aiming it in the wrong direction."

"No, I'm not."

"Okay, wise guy. Well, we'll see how long it takes you that way..."

He continued to adjust the telescope, until he was stopped in his tracks.

He was being engulfed in a bright light.

"What the... Jayne, is this what I think it is?" He was surprisingly calm.

"Yes, Johnny. It is. What else could it be?"

"They're going to abduct ME?"

"Yes."

"WHAT? Why? They can't do that! Why would they do that?!"

"Johnny, please just stay calm. Struggling isn't going to help you. Just calm down."

"Calm down?! CALM DOWN?! How can I calm down?! I don't want to be abducted! They CAN'T abduct me! YOU! You bitch! How can you just stand there? You have to help me! HELP ME! Make it STOP!"

"It's the only way..."

Johnny's screaming became more and more incoherent. Jayne stepped away from the telescope and looked out over the platform.

Behind her, he continued to scream. She addressed him, though it was obvious that he wouldn't hear her. "I'm sorry, Johnny."

Johnny watched the earth as it fell out from under him. His helplessness enraged him, but he had screamed himself out, so he quietly accepted his fate.

Jayne stepped out of the lowest level of the tower. "So, he's gone."

"Yes, I saw the light," Stella said.

"Poor Johnny. Do you think we went too far?"

"No, I do not. And we don't have the luxury of regret. He has to be convinced."

"I hope it doesn't backfire."

"It won't. He'll be upset, but they will talk to him, and make him understand. He has to see it our way. He's the son of P.T. No. 9. How could he even consider turning his back on our mission?"

"He's in love with her."

"Another luxury that we do not have."

Jayne turned and looked at her, with an expression of deep sadness. Stella noticed it, but remained stoic, and turned away again. "John Smith needs to realize that, as one of us, his destiny is chosen for him. He's obligated to pass those genetics down to his hybrid children. He's a breeder. That's his role in our society."

"If Johnny doesn't want to accept his true nature, he's denying a part of himself."

"And if he doesn't accept his role in our mission, he's dooming us to failure. We all do our part. If one fails, we all fail."

'"Ripp? Can you hear me? Wake up..."

He opened his eyes to find her standing by his bed. “Phi? What's wrong?”

He recognized the look on her face. He had first seen it on that night, back when they were teens, when she called him to the Specter estate. “I had a bad dream,” she said, hesitantly. “I…”

She didn’t have to explain. “It’s okay, Phi.” He reached out for her and pulled her close. “Come here.”

Just as she had promised, she had come to him in her moment of darkness. She was there, in his arms, and he could comfort her.

Again, he was reminded of that night at the Specter estate. That same question returned.

“Where’s Johnny?”

“I don’t know.”

They continued to stand there, in silence, just holding each other. Minutes passed.

Ripp didn't want to release Ophelia from his grasp, but how long was too long? At what point would his feelings be obvious? He wanted to just stay that way. He wanted to kiss her, and let her know just how much she meant to him. It didn't have to be more than that. Just a kiss. He could stop himself. He knew that she was Johnny's girl, but surely one kiss wouldn't hurt. A kiss between friends.

No. He couldn't let himself do that. It wasn't a good idea. He wouldn't be the one to do it. But it was all he really wanted. The only thing in the whole world that he truly desired.

"Phi?" He murmured in her ear, then pulled back to look into her eyes.

"Yes, Ripp?"

"I want to kiss you." He was surprise at how easily the words came out, and how honest and direct they were.

"You do?"

"I'm sorry. I just -"

She answered him with her lips, covering his delicately, and he eagerly returned the gesture. It was like taking a large gasp of air after resurfacing from under a great depth of water. Relief washed over him, as years of longing finally found release.

Ophelia kissed him with as much care and thought as she put into everything, but there was nothing tentative about it. She kissed him deeply, without reservation. She wanted to explore him and know him, to taste him and feel him, and Ripp would never refuse her. If she wanted it, he would give it to her. He'd give her anything he had to give.

He held her tightly, as he slowly, carefully, explored her mouth. It was just a kiss. Just an extension of that hug. A way to comfort her, reassure her, and let her know how he felt about her. He wouldn't let anything harm her, or frighten her, or make her sad. He never would. He'd never leave her. It seemed like a kiss was the only way to really let her know.

She might be Johnny's girl, but, right or wrong, she was his girl too.

Reluctantly, he pulled himself away from her. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't, but I can't help it."

"It's okay."

"I'm not going to..."

"I know." She knew that Ripp would never push for something if she didn't make the first move. He'd obviously held back this long. He had more willpower than they gave him credit for.

"I really care about you, Phi."

"I know. I care about you, too."

She knew that it was probably wrong, and that it would hurt Johnny. Johnny wouldn't see it as anything but a betrayal, but it wasn't just that. She loved Johnny, and she wanted to be with him. She didn't want that to change. She didn't want to do anything to hurt him. That was the last thing she wanted to do.

She loved Johnny, but she felt something for Ripp, too. Was it possible to love them both?

"We shouldn't do this," she said.

"I know. We don't have to. We won't." Again, he added, "I'm sorry."

"It happened. There's nothing we can do about it now."

"I tried not to."

"So did I."

He wanted to kiss her again. To comfort her, and reassure her, about the first kiss. It didn't make any sense. "I've wanted to kiss you for a long time."

She reached up and brushed back his hair, tucking it behind his ear, but said nothing. The silence propelled him to keep talking.

"Obviously, with you and Johnny being together, I didn't want to do anything to fuck that up, but I guess I always do that eventually, given enough time. I don't want to ruin things for you. I care about you. Both of you." He swallowed, thinking it over. "But I can't help the way I feel."

"You are so beautiful."

"So beautiful..."

He kissed her again, to emphasize the point.

"Ripp?"

"Yes, Phi?"

"Will you sleep with me?"

"What?"

"Not like that. Just sleep. In my bed. With me."

"I don't know..."

"I won't be able to get back to sleep now. Not alone."

"What about Johnny?"

"Johnny isn't here."

Ripp just stood there, frozen. Could he really do that? Could he sleep with Ophelia without actually sleeping with her? There was no doubt that he wanted to, but faced with it, he felt paralyzed.

"You told me to come to you when I needed someone," she continued.

"Yes. I meant it."

"Then, please..."

She took his hand. "I need you right now."

"Okay."

He followed her into her bedroom. It felt like he was walking into a dream. It wasn't quite real.

He was nervous, but he could be out of there before Johnny came home. He'd just wait until Ophelia fell asleep, and then he'd go back to his own room.

They pulled back the covers and slipped under the sheets. Ripp thought that staying away from Ophelia, on his own side, would be the safest thing to do. He shouldn't tempt himself further. He could resist her. He had to.

He didn't want to press his luck, but lying there, next to her, he was compelled to get closer. That's all he really wanted. To be close to Ophelia.

He reached out for her, instinctively. He wrapped his arms around her body, and pulled himself closer. Her hand found his, and she nudged herself back into the nook of his body. Was that what she had wanted all along? She wanted to be close to him too. As he curled into her, he felt consumed by love for Ophelia. He was on fire, yet he wanted to burn more. If he could have pulled her directly into his body, he would have.

Ophelia felt him relax into her, and he let out a deep sigh. He was content. She knew that he had wanted this, and it was good for him. He wanted someone to love him. Ripp needed to be loved, and she needed him too. He wasn't just a replacement for Johnny. He was different. He understood her in ways that Johnny did not, and his love for her might be different, but it was just as sincere. She knew it wasn't safe to feel that way, but she wanted to be with him too.

She also wondered what it would be like to have his skillful hands moving over her, and to feel the weight of his body. To yield to him. She shouldn't even think about that, with him so close to her. It would be so easy to invite Ripp's touch, and if she initiated it, she had no doubt that he would give her exactly what she wanted. Instead, she focussed on the feeling of his arms around her, the heat that his body gave off, the sound of his breath, and the way he smelled. She could hear his heart beating. She could feel it too.

Ripp held Ophelia close, and quickly forgot his plan to leave for his own room. Removing himself from the warmth of her body seemed like a cruel punishment, and he couldn't bring himself to do it. He wanted to prolong that feeling for as long as he could, so he stayed. He held her, just like that, until they both fell asleep.