Simsecret Discussion

[strangetomato]

Man, it's been a while since I've been so involved in a discussion in simsecret (about warnings for gay content, and how this contributes to homophobia vs. it being a legitimate warning for the "genre" of slash). I don't always jump into the fray of these debates, but gender and sexuality are the topics where I can't help but suit up and yell, "Okay, let's play ball!" :P Yes, you could say they are my pet isms, in the sense that they are the ones I am mostly tuned in to.

If anyone wants to toss out their two cents (or more) here, we can continue the chat. Feel free to discuss and debate among yourselves. Just keep it clean, folks.

ETA: After using the sports metaphor above, I ended up with Centerfield by John Fogerty in my head. Argh! It's like I'm stuck at a family wedding back home in The Cove (name of hometownvillage has been changed to protect the guilty). :P

And I've added a music suggestion to hopefully lighten the mood (and because my SO has amassed something of a Big Fat Gay Music Collection).

Comments

[simsinthecity.livejournal.com]

Okay, I'll take back that first statement you quoted me on. I guess I hadn't thought of those kinds of people. But from what I have seen here in the Sims community, that still holds true.

And by that second quote, I mean that just taking away the "warnings" or whatever else we can call them, isn't going to do the trick. I think if you want to get rid of homophobia, it will take more than just that.

I didn't mean to say anything that validates persecution or bigotry or anything, so I'm sorry for that. This whole subject is something I still have to give a lot of thought to, so what I've been saying isn't really expressing well how I feel about this. I'll try thinking a little more before I talk about it again.

[strange-tomato.livejournal.com]

I have to comment on the second point. Homophobia and heterosexism are never going to simple go away if people do not pick away at these small, seemingly harmless things like warnings for gay content.

I have been working for community-based organizations and nonprofit NGOs for quite some time now, and this is the only way to really make these changes. Laws and things are great, but they don't change commonly-held beliefs and opinions. It is only through education and advocacy that we can challenge those beliefs and change them. It's asking a classroom of middle schoolers WHY we bully boys for wearing pink as so on (and I have done this, pleased to see at least a handful of lightbulbs lighting up over their heads), it's having the balls (and ovaries) to say that you think a joke is (insert ism here)-ist, even to your friends.

When we're talking about entertainment, which is sort of what we do with sim stories in a very minor way (meaning we're not really making big change unless we're in a more mainstream media, but it does all make some small difference), our best measure for making these changes and promoting acceptance is to just include it, no questions asked.

You don't have to feel bad for expression that opinion. It's good that you brought it up, so we can discuss it. It's quite easy to express a view that is homophobic without realizing it, because it slips by and is never questioned. You just never thought about it that way. It's very positive that, once pointed out to you, you ARE questioning it. For that, I commend you.

When challenging it, we also need to be clear that we're talking about "people who are behaving in homophobic ways" rather than homophobes, bigots, etc. I think that's where we lose people a lot of the time. All of us will behave this way if we aren't aware of the other side. We need to depersonalize it, so people don't automatically get defensive.

[simsinthecity.livejournal.com]

That was my point, exactly. Taking away warnings is a good start to ending homophobia and heterosexism, but there needs to be more to it.

Even though I follow a religion that tells me homosexuality and the like is immoral, I'm unsure as to whether anything should be legally prohibited the way it is. In that sense I feel like the parent who finds out his child is gay, and even though I think it's wrong, I still want them to be happy doing what they want.