strangetomato: (rippphisexing)
Strange Tomato ([personal profile] strangetomato) wrote2010-02-14 02:30 pm

Drabble+: Condom Commercial

Prompt: Ripp is asked to star in a condom commercial
Characters: Ripp Grunt and Ophelia Nigmos
Wordcount: 234
Imagecount: 14
Warnings: sexually suggestive

Happy Valentines Day! I recieved this drabble prompt just yesterday, and it seemed timely, so here's a little commercial for you.











Hey, there! I'm Ripp Grunt, of The Shifting Paradymes.




I'm here today to talk to you about Woohoo brand condoms.




When you're a rock star and sex god like I am, you need a foolproof strategy for avoiding unwanted "surprises."




Do you have any idea how many kids I could have by now if I wasn't careful?

A LOT.




And just between you and me, I've even done a couple of things that could have gotten ME pregnant! Not cool.




That's why I'm a firm — no, rock hard — believer in using protection. And when it counts, I put my trust in Woohoo condoms.




Woohoo brand is reliable, take it from me! I've done extensive testing, and they have yet to fail me. Oh, some of the things I've done... and they never break! And they come in so many different varieties: flavoured, ultra-thin, glow in the dark, or my personal favourite, ribbed for her pleasure.

Don't leave home without 'em, kids!




I always take a dozen or so with me, wherever I go, especially when I'm out and about. You never know when you might need them.








And getting caught without... well, that's no fun!




The boy scouts were right. It pays to be prepared.




This Valentines Day, give 'em what they really want, but wrap it well! It's the little details that count, and you can't go wrong with Woohoo brand condoms.








[identity profile] morkmork.livejournal.com 2010-02-14 06:09 pm (UTC)(link)
Lol. So awesome!
ext_337038: (Default)

[identity profile] spyroeldragon.livejournal.com 2010-02-14 06:23 pm (UTC)(link)
lmao! xD that is all.

[identity profile] an-nas.livejournal.com 2010-02-14 06:36 pm (UTC)(link)
Haha! Awesome. :D

[identity profile] profbutters.livejournal.com 2010-02-14 07:15 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, this had me on the FLOOR. Wait--not that way. "Extensive testing," indeed!

[identity profile] amaryssobellus.livejournal.com 2010-02-14 07:16 pm (UTC)(link)
LOL! Oh Ripp... only you.

[identity profile] pennysims.livejournal.com 2010-02-14 07:44 pm (UTC)(link)
Bahaha, AWESOME! I love your WooHoo obsession xD

[identity profile] docnerd.livejournal.com 2010-02-14 07:45 pm (UTC)(link)
So... much... funny...

[identity profile] dgjamie.livejournal.com 2010-02-14 07:46 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh dear lord, that last line just had me DYING! lol

[identity profile] niloublue.livejournal.com 2010-02-14 08:15 pm (UTC)(link)
Haha, this is awesome, so funny! XD

[identity profile] meetme2theriver.livejournal.com 2010-02-14 08:49 pm (UTC)(link)
This was very, very awesome. We love you, Ripp. Never change.

That's why I'm a firm — no, rock hard — believer in using protection.

This Valentines Day, give 'em what they really want, but wrap it well!


[identity profile] texacojoe.livejournal.com 2010-02-14 10:00 pm (UTC)(link)
Why didn't we see this coming earlier?
Ripp is hilarious :)

[identity profile] peasant007.livejournal.com 2010-02-14 11:55 pm (UTC)(link)
This was awesome :) Firm -No, rock hard- indeed.

[identity profile] sims-by-izza.livejournal.com 2010-02-15 12:18 am (UTC)(link)
bahahaha! epic win!

[identity profile] themorganlegacy.livejournal.com 2010-02-15 02:13 am (UTC)(link)
LOL! Perfection.

[identity profile] muslemura.livejournal.com 2010-02-15 06:50 am (UTC)(link)
We love you, Ripp. Never change.

I second that! Pure gold :D

[identity profile] katee412.livejournal.com 2010-02-15 06:53 am (UTC)(link)
Brilliant, just, brilliant :)
ext_4032: (008)

[identity profile] crushthecamera.livejournal.com 2010-02-15 03:35 pm (UTC)(link)
My favourite thing about this is that he takes a dozen with him everywhere. And that I can't decide if he's being overly optimistic or pragmatic.

[identity profile] petalbrook.livejournal.com 2010-02-15 07:34 pm (UTC)(link)
Bwahahahah! That was hilarious! I love your version of Ripp!

OMG

(Anonymous) 2010-02-15 08:22 pm (UTC)(link)
OMG I REQUESTED THIS DRABBLE IM SO FREAKING HAPPY NOW *mush*

[identity profile] kin-thalas.livejournal.com 2010-02-16 06:14 pm (UTC)(link)
LOOOOVE!!!

I'll buy a dozen XD

[identity profile] kin-thalas.livejournal.com 2010-02-16 06:15 pm (UTC)(link)
The Sulu pic: prizeless.

[identity profile] immlegacy.livejournal.com 2010-02-28 01:33 am (UTC)(link)
You written such wise things! LOL! ^^